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About Deviant Artist LarathainMale/United States Groups :iconlove-poems-unlimited: Love-Poems-Unlimited
 
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Deviant for 6 Years
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Literature
I Have a Confession
For some weird, inexplicable reason, Beast Boy, as annoying as he was, had somehow worked his way into Raven's heart over the few years they had known each other on the Teen Titans.
Part of her really didn't know how she, constantly irritated by his very guts, could actually end up crushing on him for some reason. Maybe it was because he'd grown from that short, skinny boy into a taller, much stronger man, which suited her romantic tastes better. Well, he still wasn't the tallest on the team, but he towered over her now.
Maybe it was because his jokes had actually gotten funnier. Sure, he always made a bad joke or two occasionally, but most of the time, they were actually funny jokes now and not the corny stuff at all that was his humor in his earlier teenage years. Well, his humor was still a bit corny sometimes, she had to admit, but it was the corny kind of funny now.
And as she'd grown up, she realized that in Beast Boy's presence, she did feel
:icondarkcandlelight:darkcandlelight
:icondarkcandlelight:darkcandlelight 31 19
Mistress of death :icon0141245786:0141245786 24 7
Literature
I cried.
Where were you when the shots were fired?
What did you feel when you first heard?
What do you do?
I can tell you what I did.
I cried.
I cried at the hatred.
I cried at the fear.
I cried for the senseless loss of innocent lives.
I cried when I heard their names.
I cried for their families.
I cried for their friends.
I cried... for my people.
I cried for my brothers.
I cried for my sisters.
I cried for all of my people.
I cried for my people who had their lives taken.
And I cried for my people whose names have been dragged even further through the mud.
Because of one man.
One man who couldn't contain his hate.
One man who could control his rage.
One man who thought he was right with God.
One man who thought he was right.
It's funny.
Two communities who everyone thinks are so different.
Two communities that supposedly can't coexist.
Two communities that are... the same.
Yeah, they might not agree on everything.
But at their core, at the very center, their essence is the same.
Love.
It's a
:iconMidnightDaybreak:MidnightDaybreak
:iconmidnightdaybreak:MidnightDaybreak 23 59
Literature
Nevermore (teaser)
    Andre tapped his foot and bobbed his head with the beat of The Qemists. He shifted a little to his left, trying to better catch the glow from the streetlight on the page of his homework assignment. It was a balmy, mid-March night in Brewton, Alabama, a little after midnight, but he was perfectly comfortable in his khaki shorts and faded blue Silver Surfer shirt. The lightest trace of a cool breeze stirred the air, brushing up the caramel-colored skin of the boy’s arm and ruffling his coiffed black hair.
    It was too nice a night to be doing homework indoors, at least in Andre’s mind; the rooftop ledge of the local grocery store was a much better place. He blew a bubble with the near-flavorless gum he was chewing and let it pop, pulling the remains back into his mouth. Calculus wasn’t Andre’s best subject, but he wasn’t bad at it when he really put his mind to it.
    The song he was listening to ended and,
:iconMidnightDaybreak:MidnightDaybreak
:iconmidnightdaybreak:MidnightDaybreak 4 20
Literature
If
If..
If your arms are slick with blood rivulets and slices,
Never mind.
Please care, help me.
If the gun is cold resting on your ear, clicking the barrel,
Get over it.
I can’t.
If the noose is swinging in the air, brushing your neck,
Please don’t do that.
I can’t help myself.
The balcony seems to call endlessly, crying with sweet sorrow,
Darling don’t.
You never helped.
Bleach is mingled with the smell of death, clawing at your nose,
Talk to someone.
It’s too late.
The acidic smell of sea breeze whips your hair,
Stop pretending.
You never listen to me.
The kitchen knife burrowing itself deeper,
Please someone help her!
But.
You.
Never.
Did…
:iconAcornella:Acornella
:iconacornella:Acornella 2 28
Journal
Summer Card Project

No matter the reason, any stay in a hospital could use a little sunshine. And what better way to brighten a hospital stay than with art from the heart?
After nine successful years of DeviantArt's #HolidayCardProject, we've decided to bring the project to the summer months, for the first ever #SummerCardProject!
The idea behind this project is simple: create an inspirational card to brighten the day of someone staying in a hospital. If you're looking for even more incentive, every deviant who sends in a card will be given a free one-month Core Membership to DeviantArt.
Last December, the project received over 4,500 cards sent in from 2,000 deviants from 60 different countries/political regions. Cards are then divvied up and distributed by DeviantArt members to patients in local Los Ange
:iconmadizzlee:madizzlee
:iconmadizzlee:madizzlee 2,729 3,782
The Midnight Crow :iconvezzoso:vezzoso 58 41 Journey to the Havens :iconpeet:peet 3,740 131 yum yum straight ahead :icondimonrequiem:DimonRequiem 5 2

Activity


Ashley silao: "I smiled when I found out that when I shot you, I gave you brain damage and amnesia"

Someone you loved, never harmed, died for to protect and save. Someone whom you've saved the life of, more than once. Someone whom is delusional when she says you hurt her, because of the simple facts that her pain was self inflicted. She created every situation in which she experienced pain by any action I've ever taken. She was the cause. She is responsible. Not I.

"Hell"...a place of being...It hurts. It feels like the very life is pouring out of you. Like a void of depth that fills with waves that break the very stones upon which you've built the hallow haven that is your soul. Scattering the pebbles, crushing them into sand and dust. The roaring wind picks up, you begin to choke upon the spray of broken sorrow, your lungs are torn by the tangible air, you cough relentlessly, your throat bleeds, you can't breathe now without your lungs filling with blood, drowning in your own pain, you shudder, barely able to catch the air within the containers filling with the emptiness in your veins, your screams of pain inaudible as stars dance in front of your eyes while you suffocate on the apathy of every other sentience you encounter. All the while, in darkness, nuance reflected within the hole in your soul and the empty of your veins, shadows swim into your sight, you feel senses fail one by one, your heart slows, warmth leaving it, you shake in the icy frost of the darkness in the deepening void of something akin to the frictionless, lightless, eternity of space, the starlight of your soul dimming, your heart finally fails, all strength leaves your legs, you collapse amid the dust and sand, sinking within the gale storm, sliding into the final destination of death with a grave already dug for you: the hole left behind where the sensation of being loved should be.
  • Listening to: Craig Armstrong
  • Reading: Maestro by R.A. Salvatore
  • Watching: The night for the symphony of starlight to return
  • Playing: Nothing but my Violin
  • Eating: Nothing at the moment
words that will forever haunt me...
Ashley silao: "I smiled when I found out that when I shot you, I gave you brain damage and amnesia"
I often wonder where you go, where your life does shine
Oft into the great unknown, that some have named: "divine"
Where it is your eternity sends, if its name is heard
If a consciousness grabs its other end, if it's assigned a word
I wonder if the life is sacred, to that sentience's soul
If the thought has even merit, within the truest whole
I wonder if it smiled today, if laughter graced its heart
If it even has that organ, within its piece of part
I wonder if the light there shines, within the endless black
I wonder if its speed will slow, if it knows a lack
I wonder if the distance is found, if time there sings at all
I wonder if the longer it binds, if it becomes a crawl
I wonder if the skylight's shrine, knows its depth at all
I wonder if profound design, hits some tangible wall
I wonder if the moonlight sings, there for someone more
A Being capable of the same, from within its core
If that egress pierces its profound, as it does with me
When I perceive the lights within, the most beautiful starscape sea
Echo

Another drop falls upon the floor
A ring that sings within
Opening through another door
A knock between and in

Within the fall the time goes slow
A pause in pain to stall
Fading is life's purest glow
Caught within the call

Another droplet falls away
Darker grows the soul
Somewhere lost between night and day
Shuddering to your whole

Cracks and cuts within your heart
The soul-shine mirror shatters
Where the lines due their depart
And sensibility scatters

A droplet into the puddle fore
Mutilations everywhere
Dripping from your hallow core
Falling from you to there

Absent comfort, absent solace
You begin to think
In a time of purest solstice
As you near the brink

Another drip dares from your heart
Shaking against the cold
Has come unbidden to restart
Pain by: all the years of old

Memory returns, pain renewed
By their absent care
Though giving others smiles trued
The drops don't fade to air

Another drip falls from your hand
Resonating in your soul
Darkness daring its demand
A slowly growing hole

Bleeding from burdens born of they
Every soul you offer joy
Even after they betray
This smallest little boy

A drip resonates from childhood
Darkness that doesn't wait
Beneath innocent's true-hood
Compassionate empathy absent fate

You hear her voice in every part
Every piece of you
Shudder, shake, for its restart
That it makes so true

A droplet splashes from your eye
Crimson cannot call
The hallow within that can't deny
You gave and give your all

Wondering if she knows the fact
A truth that you and she
More beautiful than the light in black
That shines in starscape sea

A droplet falling from your wound
Loss is growing clear
Vision vaults macabre monsoon
From all you hold so dear

The echo that you hear today
Slowly shifts to shade
Dissipating self you pay
Emptiness repaid

Another drop that shatters sight
The dark begins to close
Calling for that ever night
As your skin reverts to snows

Colder than the chill alone
In pain: the muffled maze
Never had their sins atone
Even through the raze

A drop that calls to memory
That moment that they cut
Absent to discovery
From their stupor's rut

Careless calls their empty sight
Deaf they are to be
Absent hallow and beauty's right
Silence profound as is the sea

A droplet slides from body broken
Lines that wounds will draw
Lasting cuts that are their token
A lesson absent laws

Form and failure find their fault
Drowsy deals the dark
Sliding closer to asphalt
Diminishing your spark

Another drop you stare into
Bells begin to ring
Life is calling into undo
Love though, still you sing

No echo returning in the fade
As your life is stolen
Closing in, the black unmade
The deepest final frozen


-------
Echo
When I was on the floor, bleeding in a hospital, I took a pole through the back and out of my stomach to save the woman I love. I died and was resuscitated (heart stopped due to loss of blood). She abandoned me after I blacked out. (no, they didn't tell her I was dead or had died) I awoke alone in the hospital. She never once said thank you. She never once showed me she cared that I saved her life. 
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The girl whom mutilated me, abused me, who just left made me be alone, left me behind in the mess of the life she destroyed and corrupted. All the negativity I endure, all the trouble I experience, all the friends she stole from me with her lies, I have never felt more alone, and now she pretends to care by logging on to various anonymous deviantart accounts, making it seem like people are messaging me with encouraging posts, pretending that there are people reaching out to me who care when nobody really does. She just wants other people to THINK that there are people reaching out to me so that nobody else does. It is simply another way for her to keep me alone and miserable.
Hell. It hurts. It feels like the very life is pouring out of you. Like a void of depth that fills with waves that break the very stones upon which you've built the hallow haven that is your soul. Scattering the pebbles, crushing them into sand and dust. The roaring wind picks up, you begin to choke upon the spray of broken sorrow, your lungs are torn by the tangible air, you cough relentlessly, your throat bleeds, you can't breathe now without your lungs filling with blood, drowning in your own pain, you shudder, barely able to catch the air within the containers filling with the emptiness in your veins, your screams of pain inaudible as stars dance in front of your eyes while you suffocate on the apathy of every other sentience you encounter. All the while, in darkness, nuance reflected within the hole in your soul and the empty of your veins, shadows swim into your sight, you feel senses fail one by one, your heart slows, warmth leaving it, you shake in the icy frost of the darkness in the deepening void of something akin to the frictionless, lightless, eternity of space, the starlight of your soul dimming, your heart finally fails, all strength leaves your legs, you collapse amid the dust and sand, sinking within the gale storm, sliding into the final destination of death with a grave already dug for you: the hole left behind where the sensation of being loved should be.
Passion: Real's Roar Rush

Tingles tracing against the skin
Appealing to all the tensions that sing within
Passion so pure they have felt its grace
Imparted soul to soul, face to face

Tender, loving, in passion's pure kiss
Tongues that roll, never to miss
Upon your each and every inch
Spasms of ecstasy forever you flinch

Gasping with every lick and twist
Falling for the truth you can't resist
Pulling at heartstrings, the music profound
Always: the truth is where I am bound

I knew true love, I felt its hue
In every moment, we both just knew
A frosty filigree, I'll warm your sea
You'll feel the deep, inside to be

Reality and Regality, talking while free
Experiencing the passion of starscape sea
Starlight shining, your burning bright
Your skin glowing warmth, within the night

In my eyes, you knew it was me
That reached inside of you and set you free
That glow you held, your cheeks aflame
Never again were you just the same

I felt your heart, I touched a soul
You knew no trick, an honesty whole
For I won't cheat, or lie the feel
No manipulation, in passion's pure seal

I felt the light within your sight
When our eyes met, you touched my light
You always knew, forever was real
Heartbeats blazing in firebrand seal

Wondering where you are tonight
Wondering alone, diminishing light
I miss the touch, we felt so much
Building The Beauty of real's roar rush
Passion: Real's Roar Rush
The Truth is Real, and so am I
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Innocence lost

Upon the innocent, their ire arose
Like rain upon the tattered clothes
The moaning wind that spits a sorrow
As if your joy was right to harrow
Tearing upon your soul's true seal
Their reason absent to see your weal
If they understood who you were within
They would hold their will to sin
They never consider you feel it too
What this world will make you do
What horrors and harrows fill your soul
Their perspective of pretentious hole
With covered eyes they condescend
What's above, they seek un-mend
Breaking innocence is all they free
Never peering inside the sea
Within the clouds where starlight blooms
Upon the eyes their regal plumes
Piercing the profound of purest be
That is eternity for energy
That endless expanse within your egress
The light that shines from eye's so blessed
To shimmer the shine of sacred soul
That is the truth of your true whole
That re-scintillating shine that is your light
That stretches forever within the night
Whispers to body and mind its will
Commands the universe against the still
Shatters within the scatter of ill
Lacerations! Losing the fill
A design of darkness begins the grow
Dealing death, to your dearest glow
Do you remember when you were born?
Before horror gave haven to your forlorn?
Do you remember when your innocence was soaring free?
Before upon you was cast that darkest sea?
If you recall the toll's design
Tracing scars upon your shine
Defacing the purity of sacred soul's shrine
Distilling deformity within divine
I whisper that you remember it true
The truth they tried to take from you
Before you create more hate in fate
Before the darkness delves too late
Take a moment, to touch the sea
Remember your most sacred free
Remember that starlight is our we
Remember, you were once, just like me
You think you know what torture is...?

You are a hypocrite. You claim I didn't inform you of what I had endured or shared with you what has happened to me, but I did, a brief version of it, as you offered me, and yet you refused to read my message at all. I read yours, and all you have endured is paltry and negligible when you measure that what I offered you, what I've sacrificed for you, considering your situational circumstances, how you treat me, continue to treat me, and have treated me. If you had taken the time to read my message, you would have known that I was, indeed, tortured, and that you are the worst sort of human being that exists or has ever drawn breath for even claiming I cause negativity, of any sort or regard, for anyone whom has experienced torture by saying that I have been abused so, that I have endured its egressing emotional stability, and that I have not lost that same feeling of safety and solace of mind, heart, and soul someone endures after being tortured in a severe manner. (from your implication that I don't know what it feels like to be tortured, does that last part about the aftermath sum it up? If you have EVER experienced what torture is or feels like, you would know the sentiment I just described) I have been stabbed (multiple times), shot (multiple times), cheated on (multiple times), physically tortured in the form of lost body parts, quality of life, and time of life alive, all stolen by someone (one person Ashley Silao) who lied to me continuously (which is another form of psychological torture when you consider the specifics such as keeping me believing she wanted what was best for me, actually cared about me at all, and wanted me to be happy) I have been emotionally tortured and abused constantly in the regard that she told me repetitively that she wanted me to be close to her, to speak with her daily, see her daily, and when I tried to do so, she pushed me away. She claimed to me that she wanted to spend forever with me. With me and only me. Nobody else. I explained to her that I accepted her offer but then, she pushed me away, and still does, all the while, at every attempt I make to move on, to find someone who will love me as she claimed to, as I deserve, because I deserve love as profound as I offered her (and would offer someone I was with), the sort of love she claimed to want nothing more than, she interferes in any and every way she can to hinder me from being happy and discovering that solace and peace. Causing me to be alone because she is ungrateful, irrational, selfish, stupid, pretentious, inconsiderate, disrespectful, inattentive to the needs and desires of others, and possesses a delusional disregard for the pleasant, positive, and special sacrifices those whom love her make on her behalf, for her benefit, for her prosperity, and positive personal health status in every regard. (physical health, emotional health, intellectual health, and psychological health) She stole my parents and friends from me by filling their minds with lies. Has isolated me. Do you know what it is like to be forced into a situation where you can't trust anyone? Where you can't share with them everything that has happened to you, how you feel, what you felt, and why? To not be able to trust anyone with what has happened to you? To be betrayed by every person you meet because she has met them first and forces them to get close to you only to hurt you more when they drop your life into the garbage waste-fill, neglecting any sort of responsibility they had by offering you any sort of companionship or trust. Do you know how psychologically damaging that is? How that can affect the mind of someone? To open up to people only to discover that they are pretenders? That they never cared about you at all? That they were forced to? You feel parts of you are stolen away. An intimacy that cannot be replaced becomes a mockery and wound inside of you that festers and grows. Your mind spins. You...you have no idea what torture is. What I've just shared with you is psychological torture and abuse. Emotional torture and abuse. Do you still believe you know what torture is? Because I do. I haven't even begun to completely share with you EVERY facet of what I've endured. You haven't even received 50%. Do you still think I don't know what torture is?
  • Listening to: Craig Armstrong
  • Reading: Archmage by R.A. Salvatore
  • Watching: The night for the symphony of starlight to return
  • Playing: Nothing but my Violin
  • Eating: Nothing at the moment
As I lay dying

As I lay dying on the floor
I remember the look in your eyes
Not a hint of emotion did you pour
For the sacrifice that brought my demise

Colder than tundra's tinge of cold
Absent the purity of glimmer and gold
Careless mistakes you make and more
When you deny your hallow core

Death and darkness, while blind you betray
Never thankful, no sincerity did you say
As my blood pooled upon the floor
Staining my memory as the décor

The emptiness I felt as the pool did grow
Diminished my light and your true glow
My hand outstretched to hold your own
But that comfort you denied me, your worthlessness shown

Though I obviously saved your life
You left me alone to suffer the strife
That this person whom claimed to love me true
Left me to drown in that blood-filled sea hue

When I awoke, blood, I vomited upon the floor
Painful shudders from my cores
The spear-like pole I took to save your life
For the woman who wanted to be my wife

GONE! I awoke, cold and alone
In a place unknown, without a true home
Without a single person that did me care
Just more liars before me, with an unnerving stare

Never before had I felt more alone
Never before had my hopes so flown
The darkness encroached upon my soul
Filling the part of me that now had a hole

Never once did you even show that you cared
Never once did you offer me a single prayer
Never did you help, when I needed you
Instead you caused more harm, as if my sacrifice you rue

The tears that came to me, you denied
The pain I felt, to no one, could I confide
A loneliness that you have never known
But all my life beside me has grown

I offered you what no one ever will
To save you from every harrow and ill
A light and love, so pure and bright
Coalesced within the most hallow of night

You turned away and still to this day
You leave me alone, and hurt me this way
A pure profound pain, purchasing strain
And yet the antidote, you still refrain

Your lies are the answer for the reason to why
Any solace you could offer, you deem to deny
Delusions are all you dance to be
Foolish illusions, of a delirious sea

The wounds I took to save you have their toll
As significant as that profound pierced pole
Years of my life, I lost that day
While you still lie, as if I didn't pay

You left me in silence, for years and more
Never did I perceive even your shadow's décor
I gave my life and the purity of love
Sworn to the night and our stars above
As I lay Dying
Bleeding out until your heart stops...
And never once did she show me she cared...
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Every lie you communicate in response to my pain.
You were never there for me.
Especially when I need you most.
Loneliness takes a toll too.
Layers of Thought

The rose petals of profundity bloom to the soft of a midnight sea
Within their reach to every part of the material reflection of tangibility
Within the eyes of light, sorting the molds of manifest's maze

Their echo doesn't bounce upon tangible toughs
But within the light their echo is eternal
Light absorbing the crafts of be and recreating the calls of music

The dark passing on the messages and melodies of manifest
Chaos crafting chasms and a dusty drawer of forgotten lore
Where even age transcends a place or point

Apart from the real dimensions of small minds
Existing simultaneously within new foci of layered life
Transcendence is many-form

What is heaven if not a new line within the design
A painting of perception proves patient to proceed
Filling and finding while losing and egress

A parchment of pale and ink pen of color collides
Within the pen and paper are depths of dichotomies
A sharing in layers of be and become more within and without

Creations can create while crafting within the chaos of coalescence
When does formation and fizzle hold more significance?
Is there even a start and end?

Does the divine dream?
Are the dreams of the divine delivered or discovered?
Is the craft the creator? Or is the creator the creation?

A spiral or circle could whisper a way
A truth given manifest to clue a quality of creation
But what of the infinity that flies forever as always: a light

If the two are truly interchangeable, at what point are they the same?
For they must know a middle manifest
Is a triangle a special secret of the sea?

How many clues are there within all that there is?
How many have we named or perceived?
Are the missing pieces lonely? Do they know that they exist?

Is exist even a form?
Is the fabric of fabulous, this most magical maze of majesty more?
Or is all the least of less than luster more than shine and sound?

Could the container be another light?
How many lights can a light hold?
Is the light depthless in its boundlessness?

Does depth even offer significance to delineate density?
Does more weight and wear mean wealth?
Layers of lines, lusters, and lights: a list?
I remember...

A glow that radiates a purity of spirit
A smile so warm its virulence is wine
Intoxicating the soul to joy with it
All the while the sensation closer to divine

As if the very skies were home
Soaring amid the memories of purest life
Evolving new forms within your grown
Above each and every facet of strife

Singing songs of species splendor
Ferrying fancy in every paradigm
Mystifying the mind to render
Lost within your eyes and mine

Cascading chasms that fall away
Waterfall spray to rainbows shadow
All the negative that we waylay
Piercing profundity to chaos' callow

Wonder and why: we whisper true
To each other we swear through time
And every doubt I will subdue
By Starscape Sea: our heart's design
Love

A concept that I've read before
A concept spoken in word
A piece of profundity from sentient lore
You've never seen but heard

A sentiment that I hold within
The sense of divinity shared
Absent the banal who prefer to sin
While compassionate souls sure cared

This concept and word: nuance given form
A paradigm of paradigm
Something sacred from the storm
A boundless profound of time

Both tender and tough, true and tried
This sentiment's shrine has soul
A call to conscious acts complied
Meaning to measure your whole

Beheld within the shadows of woe
Simultaneously within the light
Fear and friend to depths untold
Significance shining within the night

A peaceful presence oh so well
A hallow of heaven's light
A harrowing haven hosting a hell
Dichotomy's dearest delight

Introspective stasis of sure
A force of foremost fell
Austere auspicious aghast allure
And to all else: a quell

By every strength we all hold dear
A healing salve of hope
A fortitude against your every fear
A pull to soul's elope

Windows bleeding shine and sight
Holding more than view
This very threshold to tangible trite
And sparkles of rainbow hues

Banal and beautiful bear this bask
And truth never finds more full
From the tear of turbulent task
A soul shiver shudder stream to pull

Eye contact that shares its flame
A sovereignty in statue
The purest passion knows its name
And nuance to its due

For every sense sure sings its song
Its benevolence that lights the sky
A place that makes everywhere belong
Without a reason of wonder to why

A sleight to sleet and cry of glee
Screaming the sky for all the call
A shard within the starscape sea
More precious than your all

A freedom and fury of forever in form
A fracture to the fabric of time
A fire against the cold forlorn
The most intricate intense design

This manifest we coalesce the heart
A structure of insanity's shrine
A pulse too pure to ever part
Where destiny dreamed divine

A wonder of an endless seek
A road of regal right
A pathway of pursuit profound to peek
Squinting against its light

The brightest burning of the sky
Every color of shade and shine
Every sense is smitten by
The complexity of its design

The power of purity within the soul
Sings the substance true
Filling every hallow hole
When one becomes the two

The dark never dies is what is true
Save where this light resides
A power beyond the foolish who
Take the dark's decides

The instant of the speed of light
Casting into the deep
Lasting forever within the night
That The Starscape Sea will keep

Always! Surviving within the black
Memory and marvel's shrine
Fortune finding its touch of fact
Within the singularity most divine

Love is the concept of all and we
A beauty beyond the be
Breaking broken to set us free
Within The Starscape Sea
Love
About REAL and TRUE love (In retrospect)
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Missing

The light grace of the drops of a dream
Into the heart by the song of the soul
Where longing and love are pure to their mean
And all the while their music is whole
Another gale and gust that whispers by
Offering words within the mind
A message sending spirits to fly
Though the ghost of beauty, I just can't find
A touch of serenity I miss so dear
That comfort of caring I barely remember
Meeting eye contact of the sincere
Has been gone for more than pair December
Time's distance passes differently in pain
Jumping in starts, and falling to slow
As if you can't keep up, like the insane
As the sorrow instills: a scar to glow
A touch...a gift I miss to know
A smile offered to gift me mine
Something sacred to warm the soul
Within my heart: its gleam and shrine
Ask yourself honestly:
"What is the true depth of light?"
Depth

You could never see, the depth of me
In every shadow, of every sight
In every tempest, lives a sea
In every star, there is a night

In all the trials, and tests to sew
In every corner of my being
Of all the truths, you couldn't know
In your every call that is obscene

Your profundity pales, a shallow sea
Austere admits what is the light
In all the thoughts of sentience be
Where hallow and hell have come to fight

In and for: a thought's every see
By the calm within the sea
In the fire that consumes the free
Never is one in all of me

The forsaken fear that fills your all
A tentative taste is all you know
But I've perceived that flight you fall
A single shrine, a mote of glow

Light is often mistaken sight
Depths of darkness bear their sign
Even within the hallow night
You couldn't conceive its full divine

I've touched what you could never feel
I've tasted harrows of the soul
I've been scarred in hallow seal
The patterns couldn't form my whole

Walking alone though not by will
The deep of evolution's song
Despite the world and all its ill
I've saved lives though, all along

She attempted to break me by every lie
Bringing forth dark endless death
She scorned the truth within the sky
Pathetic and selfish in every breath

Stealing light within insanity
Delusion is her prayer
A life playing victim, in depravity
Absent compassion's factual fare

Though she'll lie, I saw her still
Playing victim is what she brings
Pieces of me, she takes to ill
Pretending that I deserve these things

You hide and whisper against the sight
You think you know what is the all
But never could you last a single night
Within the fullest that you fall

Flying through the air you will
Pieces within succumb to ill
But you know not, your movement still
You hold onto: death's dear chill

What is life to the blind in thee
What it was that you can't see
What tidal waves that depth the sea
When all you do is run to be

Never facing the fight known not
Never questioned the eternity see
Never thought it is what is so naught
Is before your eyes to ever be

Within you is another sight
Within you is a hallow power
Within YOU is a mote of night
Found within your darkest hour

The night awakens in every sheen
The time of turbulence is your ghost
When soulfire found its golden gleam
And regal renders a rival toast

Tips of taint, you touch in me
Thinking to paint, the pure to gray
But I fight, within this sea
And here you wander, when you've lost your way

Every path that enters: shadow's sea
The black that bears a truth of beauty
A touch is made internally
In the brightest singularity

A soul is something you read about
More than a shard of some simple fathom
You've never heard its hallow shout
Within pure pain's dearest chasm

Tactile doesn't tell you here
Sight is merely selective
Sound not found so absent near
And touch within has gone defective

Taste is something you lost to true
A memory you won't find
And now the liberty you've come to rue
Dawns the ONLY dear divine

Complex Caves and echoes egress
Music another manifested seem
A mental pressure you'll lose to stress
Within the murder of singularity's scream

Mutilation, you know it not
Pain is but a whisper
Never understanding for me: you've caught
Your lifelong sprint a blister

Never is the empty you know
Ever the lie you say
You'll never be to bathe the glow
Absent a soul today

Can you see within the dark?
Can you hear the song?
Can you find the hallow spark?
The part of you: your whole belongs
Depth
Ask yourself: what is the true depth of light?
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"We don't know what you are..."

I heard these words spoken to me by the president of the united states. His generals, his staff, scientists and scholars, had tested my blood and could not identify what it was I had done, how I had evolved into a being that is different from all mankind. I am different. These words resonate within and offer me a complex array of different sentiments and instill many different thoughts toward myself and my future. I want to be a neurosurgeon, this does not, nor will not, change, regardless of this circumstantial truth in which I have been made to bear alone. Who could I confide in? Who would understand, or try to? There are so many questions I have, so many aspects of personal research I am pursuing in my search to discover what tests they have done and made to my body. I have been unconscious in a hospital a couple of times. I wonder about what was done to me, what they may have stolen from me in their pursuit to understand what I did, by lieu of willpower, to change myself from the rest of my species. I am new. I am different. I am unique. These are some profound concepts that I have pondered and still think about to this day.

I am living proof of evolution. Do you have any idea what that would do to the general public? Theology, creationism, belief...these are concepts people fight, kill, and die for. If it were publicized that an evolved human existed, how do you think the average person (who are known to be less than rational, profound, or adequately intelligent enough to deal with, or even take the time to properly consider, such a fact) is going to do about, or do with, that information? There are all sorts of negative situations, and horrible atrocities, that could occur from people being told that evolution isn't a theory anymore, but a FACT of reality. I was told that it would be inauspicious to them (the American government) for me to start showing people the full extent of my abilities and what it is I am capable of. (I am paraphrasing, he wasn't nearly as profound about the subject as I, because I have taken the time to consider the ramifications and possibilities of such a decision) His (the president of the united states) generals professed their desire that I be taken into custody, put on a lab table, and dissected for study. He (the president) assured me that he wouldn't allow that to happen because he knew I was, I quote, "a good kid". He is correct. I am not going to use this fact and facet of my existence for self gratuity or grandiosity. I am far more pure and intelligent than that. I won't allow others to bring harm to innocent people because of what I am, especially if I am capable of stopping such a situation from coming to coalescence.

The truth, given the abstract form of being that houses thought, yet simultaneously exists in the physical medium of reality by lieu of vocal intonations that spill into the void creating another form of forever in the constitution of their be, yet somehow imperceptible, this state of being is extremely important and entirely profound, yet the world (everyone I've ever met in any form of this medium of communication, intimately and continuously, through its use) doesn't know this fact or the above aforementioned ones. They treat communication and the possibility of personal growth as something to be avoided and even with fear. Taught by this amalgamation of societal standards within their constitutional causes and consistencies, people treat meeting someone they don't know as more dangerous than hopeful and interesting. We live in a weird and dangerous time, but because of the people in it, also because of how they were raised.

I think anyone who is profound has experienced some sort of terrible tragedy in their life and thus has low and weak moments they endure. Some perceive pain as something of a weakness, something that should be removed and forgotten with all possible speed, but what those morons forget is that pain is one of the greatest teachers life possesses. It forces us to acclimate to our surroundings, to be more careful in the face of dangerous things, to learn and offer our consciousness more consideration of the universe and all that there is, or can be, within it. I don't think you are less for having a sensitive side, I don't believe that of anyone, because sentimentality and emotion are pure aspects of reality that should never be lost or thrown away. We feel for a reason. We experience for a reason. We live for a reason. We learn for a reason. We create for a reason. Reason is a regal realm of reality.

I don't know who saw you in a state where you were low and thus decided to change what and how they think about you, if someone has, but you should know that I won't. I have felt a darkness too profound to discount someone else experiencing something similar and so familiar to me. The people who denigrate those who have truly experienced profound pain usually know nothing of it, or are simply fools who don't appreciate what they don't understand (which is a lot) and are of the sort of people who won't ever evolve intellectually, emotionally, physically, or psychologically because they don't want to due to personal failures of perspective and a narrow-mindedness that can only impede growth, not to mention that they are too stupid to understand their stubbornness holds them back. Non-intellectuals are some of the coldest and worst people the world has ever seen because they don't think, they don't consider the effects their actions and words have on others, nor do they consider anyone beyond themselves and their own selfish desires. They don't understand that people have feelings, and are just as important as their own. Some people are too pretentious and self-possessed to understand that they are not the only sentient singularity in existence. There are others existing around them. Some of them even greater than they are. I know what it is like to come from nothing. I know what it is like to have people sneer at you and think themselves better than you are, without any thought to what and who you truly are. Everything to their consciousness is "mine" and "me" and in that capacity, if everyone adopted that perspective of perception, we would all fall into a state of harming each other to own everything until only one person remained, society would cease, facts would fall to fiction, and every part of us that is beautiful would die. Creativity (every paradigm of art: music, drawing, painting, engineering, poetry), the passing of knowledge, discovery of intellectual proportions, discovery of profundity's pulse and passions...; there is no singular measure to the loss humanity would suffer from selfishness being the singular virtuous ambition of sentience. Compassion is truly sacred.

"We don't know what you are..."

When I heard those words I felt/experienced/thought...

  • Listening to: Craig Armstrong
  • Reading: Rise of the king by R.A. Salvatore
  • Watching: The night sky
  • Playing: nothing but my violin
  • Eating: nothing for awhile
  • Drinking: Whiskey with fruit-punch chaser
Why?

Obfuscated by malice, the will of selfish
Why those who claim to care will harm
And though I offer love so weightless
They often forget my soul, alarm

When I offer a smile and purity to light
I often wonder if you see
If you conceive my sentiment, right
Within the depths of hallow sea

When the sorrow of solitary sings from soul
And you leave me alone, ever to dim
As if you don't see the scars of my whole
That were afflicted by what had been

In that darkness, I whispered to you
My heart and soul, offered their mark
And you had said: you wished undo
What cast shadow upon my spark

But this damage is pressing me
Carving into the hallow-est sea
And though you said your love to be
I didn't feel the truth to see

How can you know that which I bleed
When you don't see what harmed me
When evil planted the most pain seed
When you never peered inside to see

I listened to you, but you didn't for me
How could you say you heard my heart
When swallowing profound found my sea
And even YOU partook a part

You think you were harmed, but the truth is worse
You think I was wrong, but never you see
What it was that is my curse
What tormented once, that hallow-est sea

I wanted you to hear my soul
Wanted you to understand
I wanted you to share my toll
Absent the selfish damned demand

Why is it, you look down on me
When you might know the pain I see
What it was: a mutilated fee
Within the light you loved in me

Why?
Remember

The ghost of my dreams and memory
Haunting heaven is that way
So soon and short discovery
We didn't have the time to stay

Through all the pain she never perceived
In every song we sing
She was absent the truth that we conceived
Where celestial to divine so bring

For the clouds of imagination call
In the deepest darkness dare
Filling more than each others all
Lost to found: we share

Apparition austere to regal's right
Auspicious as the sea
What we perceive within the night
Where the sacred is always we

Delving into profound's pure place
Sentiment shines within
A position of purity, a gleam of grace
A beauty absent sin

When our eyes locked with our hands
To forever that we swore
Against the sullied and their demands
Absent their weight in core

A voice in my heart, as you hear me
We share so much more than soul
Chaos coalesced a single be
In the piece that made you whole

A Singularity shining bright
Filling the sea with light
Thoughts, concepts, and their sight
By the starscape sea within the night
Remember
A ghost of purity, real and true
Against the deepest blue
Color cast it truest hue
Into me and you
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deviantID

Larathain

Artist
United States
"Some people create, others are simply created..." ~ L.N.S. (me)
(literary art, music, knowledge, etc.) is what this statement meant by the word: "create"

"Reason: That thing everyone is born with but something that not everyone possesses" - Me

It has come to my attention that an ex-girlfriend/creeper/stalker has been sending people whom comment on my art messages filled with negativity. I suffered from Amnesia because of her (though my mind is attempting a repair of sorts, the situation is convolutedly complex, I can create new long term memories but with difficulty, and the process has been stressful and filled with a loss in many facets of my life, but that doesn't mean I will constantly forget those that I meet, and am incapable of creating new memories at all, it is too complicated to put here in this place...if you are interested, ask me sometime...) not to mention the loss perceived by a great series of paradigms within the memory of my life have been stolen from me. I was attacked, and thus shot, in the head, by the malevolent deluded desires of this psychotic ex-girlfriend whom forms self-delusions and lies compulsively, and frequently, in an attempt to make herself seem the victim when in fact she is nowhere near vindicated of her veracity and validity as the villain. She has murdered many, and each time has deluded others into believing it was an accident or that she was innocent. (car accidents are her specialty) Her diagnosis of narcissism/psychopathy(a lack of empathy and true moral insanity)/pretentiousness/personal-self-delusion/violence-absent-rational-cause is valid and true, I held her hand through therapy, and can tell you, she is nothing and nowhere near compassionate or caring. Just selfish/avaricious, and malicious to anyone whom ever has loved or cared about her. (at least in my experience) I have tried to message her, tried to contact her, tried to help her, but she has refused any and all attempts at repairing her damaged mind and soul. I honestly wish she would return to the light, and reject the ravenous retarded regal-less rage machine she has become.

Moving on...

"I believe honesty is an important facet of community. I offer honesty and truth to every singularity of sentience I encounter and expect the same in return. Honesty helps us grow and helps us reach higher heights of personal growth previously unattainable because of our inherent singular place of perspective: "being inside of your vessel." Sometimes there is a benefit of having someone share with you their perspective, as they can perceive from a place that you cannot: "outside of yourself." The understanding of which, and profundity of which, I'm sure, is not lost on you." - Me

"Being a realist myself, I find the prejudiced opinion that realists and pessimists are the same and are cowardly by hiding in the shadows, distant to community, disrespectful and ill-founded. Being a realist is to understand that there are certain truths to the-universe/all-that-there-is that cannot be denied. To never lie to yourself, or allow yourself to be mislead by the burdens of self-delusion, narrow-mindedness, prejudice, or wishful thinking. To remain within the realms of perspective and perception offered the monikers: "logical thought", "rational possibility", and "truth."

I do know that some use certain facts found within such an advanced understanding of intellect and profundity to rationalize removing oneself from society as a whole because it is, logically, safer. If someone were to do so, I agree with you, that person is, indeed, cowardly and simply using half-truths to deny the existence of any other empirical evidence to acquire. Do you know every human being that is currently alive? No? Then you cannot say that EVERY situation of human interaction will be conducted or experienced in a negative manner. There could very well be good people out there, and some people who were once evil or who had committed negative actions CAN indeed come back to the light of compassion and righteousness.

That is to say, can you still maintain a wary perspective of Americans because most of them are selfish, self-possessed, pretentious, avaricious, apathetic feed machines that only want one thing: "more." Yes, yes you can. Does that mean you should treat them all in such a manner or even negatively at all? No, it does not. You should give people a chance to prove their worth and character before you judge them unfairly based on prejudice and stereotypes. There is a reason stereotypes are called stereotypes and not: "facts." It is a separate concept entirely.

If someone were to say: "most people of pure Irish genetic descent have pale white skin." That is a truth. Most of the people who are Irish do indeed have pale white skin. But if you were to say: "all Irish people possess pale white skin." That is not a truth, but merely a personal prejudice of perception on their part. There is, indeed, at least one difference between pessimists and realists, which would explain why they are two separate words: "they are two different paradigms of perception/concepts." -Me


Someone once said: "Art doesn't come from happiness"...

I say: "Most often, it doesn't. That is true, and yet, sometimes, it does. Sometimes, the purest sentiments construct the most elegant and graceful frames of focus, the most pristine purity of sensation within sentiment is profound. Welcome to art, where magic and majesty mystify the mind, send the soul screaming in the spikes of ecstasy found within the significant and special summits of sophistication found by the star-flares of starlight within the sensation of soaring that our soul feels when we sense that rare, almost tangible, sensation of being alive. Welcome to sentience. Welcome to soul. Welcome to Starlight." - Me


"If something is the truth, don't waste time with bothering in the attempt to confuse and corrupt ascertaining the truth by trying to label it as something else, don't distort reality or lie to or delude yourself, it is simply this: "the truth," and nothing else..." -Me


"Kind words can save and change lives. You never know what may, or may not, find it's way to significance in the consciousness of another being's sentience. I hope they have found a way to brighten the light of your life. Sometimes a light requires a catalyst to crystalize the color within it." -Me

"I hope you continue to enjoy a period of prosperity, peace, and a pleasant passionate playful point of perception within the place of your soul's position in the maelstrom of magic and majesty we name: reality."

"Death has ever been by my hand and heart. I have watched loved ones pass from this world. I have faced imminent death more than once. I have buried friends. The loss and subsequent pain aren't the parts of my light: "the will", that hold my hands steady during what may very well be the final challenges I face, it is the understanding that I fight for what is in accord with that soul. The blade that bears my name, the strength of my convictions, the significance of the evolved body and soul I possess, the brilliance within the light of my intellect shining in the spirit perceived through more than just my eyes, all facets of whom I am. I've held onto starlight within, and through, the worst and best of humanity." -Me

"Being an evolved human is a lonely position of reality. I am the only one of my kind. A realization I have come to respect, come to understand as truth/fact, and have spent time attempting to create terms of definition and achieve a state of complete peace within acceptance of this." -Me

"I have fought against the devils and demons within and without, beside fanatics of faith though their lectures still possess insight and significance, giving them endless patience and yet maintaining an open mind to their insanity is somewhat of a difficulty, though, I'm sure, they mean well in their diatribes of dark and light. I live alongside the demented and delusional, and those who've claimed to have achieved a mental state that was disillusioned, though, honestly, every sentient singularity that claimed to clarity was farther away from crystal than they thought. Self-delusion and pretentiousness are something of a viral disease in this manifestation of reality in which I reside. It infects the brightest when they obtain a measure of light that surpasses those around them, when they perceive their light as the brightest around, they stop searching for every source of light. That is their failure. They cease their growth. A star cannot sustain such an existence. I think that is why they burn out and explode. Starbursts to supernova at the pronouncement of pride. A brilliant birth to behold, boundless in brilliant beauty, a majesty and magic with no equal, but maybe that is why only I remain. Every party member, partner, every sacred singularity of sentience, by their luminous light: every star, has fallen. Only I remain. Is it because I believe in the facet of understanding that is realism? Humility within endless growth? Ever entering situations with open ears, eyes, and mind, learning whatever there is to learn? Is it because I consume all the knowledge and continuously strive to grow? Evolution is significant to my existence. It is a concept that helps to define what has happened to me. I evolved. I am no longer human. I understand that now. I was, but now I am something more. Those who have borne witness to the truth of my personal evolution know that I do not speak in jest or in falsehoods about such a profound subject. I have evolved. (this is the truth, if you've gotten this far, ask me about it sometime, what you hear will more than surprise you, I assure you, the truth is something more than your perception has perceived)" -Me

"To Doctor Charles Darwin, I would have loved to enjoy a conversation with you...maybe I'll meet you one day, who knows what door deigns in the darkness of death...(I don't believe in the concepts of hell or heaven, god or satan, these, to me, are fantastic constructs of imagination, the bible is a supremely well made work of fiction with a positive moral, ethical, and inspirational message throughout it's passages, but...it is still a work of fiction. I use logic, sensation, and science as a basis for the facts that I hold.)" - Me


(if we were ever allowed a name of our own choosing)

- Larathain Nai - Lo Starlight

aka

-Scott M. B. J. (the true author of every piece of art on this page, people have tried to steal my art and claim it their own, I can only wonder why)

"Some journeys are made with no destination or end conceived, but discovered through reaching the horizon." - Me

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:iconmarjoriechamillard:
MarjorieChamillard Featured By Owner Mar 14, 2017
Thank you for tha watch!
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:iconghostoftheemptygrave:
Thanks for the watch :)
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drajk Featured By Owner Mar 14, 2017  Hobbyist Filmographer
thank you for the watch! :D
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:iconsilkenwebs:
SilkenWebs Featured By Owner Mar 13, 2017  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks for the watch!
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:iconmrdatatheawesome:
MrDataTheAwesome Featured By Owner Mar 13, 2017  Student Digital Artist
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE WATCH!!

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