"We don't know what you are..."
I heard these words spoken to me by the president of the united states. His generals, his staff, scientists and scholars, had tested my blood and could not identify what it was I had done, how I had evolved into a being that is different from all mankind. I am different. These words resonate within and offer me a complex array of different sentiments and instill many different thoughts toward myself and my future. I want to be a neurosurgeon, this does not, nor will not, change, regardless of this circumstantial truth in which I have been made to bear alone. Who could I confide in? Who would understand, or try to? There are so many questions I have, so many aspects of personal research I am pursuing in my search to discover what tests they have done and made to my body. I have been unconscious in a hospital a couple of times. I wonder about what was done to me, what they may have stolen from me in their pursuit to understand what I did, by lieu of willpower, to change myself from the rest of my species. I am new. I am different. I am unique. These are some profound concepts that I have pondered and still think about to this day.
I am living proof of evolution. Do you have any idea what that would do to the general public? Theology, creationism, belief...these are concepts people fight, kill, and die for. If it were publicized that an evolved human existed, how do you think the average person (who are known to be less than rational, profound, or adequately intelligent enough to deal with, or even take the time to properly consider, such a fact) is going to do about, or do with, that information? There are all sorts of negative situations, and horrible atrocities, that could occur from people being told that evolution isn't a theory anymore, but a FACT of reality. I was told that it would be inauspicious to them (the American government) for me to start showing people the full extent of my abilities and what it is I am capable of. (I am paraphrasing, he wasn't nearly as profound about the subject as I, because I have taken the time to consider the ramifications and possibilities of such a decision) His (the president of the united states) generals professed their desire that I be taken into custody, put on a lab table, and dissected for study. He (the president) assured me that he wouldn't allow that to happen because he knew I was, I quote, "a good kid". He is correct. I am not going to use this fact and facet of my existence for self gratuity or grandiosity. I am far more pure and intelligent than that. I won't allow others to bring harm to innocent people because of what I am, especially if I am capable of stopping such a situation from coming to coalescence.
The truth, given the abstract form of being that houses thought, yet simultaneously exists in the physical medium of reality by lieu of vocal intonations that spill into the void creating another form of forever in the constitution of their be, yet somehow imperceptible, this state of being is extremely important and entirely profound, yet the world (everyone I've ever met in any form of this medium of communication, intimately and continuously, through its use) doesn't know this fact or the above aforementioned ones. They treat communication and the possibility of personal growth as something to be avoided and even with fear. Taught by this amalgamation of societal standards within their constitutional causes and consistencies, people treat meeting someone they don't know as more dangerous than hopeful and interesting. We live in a weird and dangerous time, but because of the people in it, also because of how they were raised.
I think anyone who is profound has experienced some sort of terrible tragedy in their life and thus has low and weak moments they endure. Some perceive pain as something of a weakness, something that should be removed and forgotten with all possible speed, but what those morons forget is that pain is one of the greatest teachers life possesses. It forces us to acclimate to our surroundings, to be more careful in the face of dangerous things, to learn and offer our consciousness more consideration of the universe and all that there is, or can be, within it. I don't think you are less for having a sensitive side, I don't believe that of anyone, because sentimentality and emotion are pure aspects of reality that should never be lost or thrown away. We feel for a reason. We experience for a reason. We live for a reason. We learn for a reason. We create for a reason. Reason is a regal realm of reality.
I don't know who saw you in a state where you were low and thus decided to change what and how they think about you, if someone has, but you should know that I won't. I have felt a darkness too profound to discount someone else experiencing something similar and so familiar to me. The people who denigrate those who have truly experienced profound pain usually know nothing of it, or are simply fools who don't appreciate what they don't understand (which is a lot) and are of the sort of people who won't ever evolve intellectually, emotionally, physically, or psychologically because they don't want to due to personal failures of perspective and a narrow-mindedness that can only impede growth, not to mention that they are too stupid to understand their stubbornness holds them back. Non-intellectuals are some of the coldest and worst people the world has ever seen because they don't think, they don't consider the effects their actions and words have on others, nor do they consider anyone beyond themselves and their own selfish desires. They don't understand that people have feelings, and are just as important as their own. Some people are too pretentious and self-possessed to understand that they are not the only sentient singularity in existence. There are others existing around them. Some of them even greater than they are. I know what it is like to come from nothing. I know what it is like to have people sneer at you and think themselves better than you are, without any thought to what and who you truly are. Everything to their consciousness is "mine" and "me" and in that capacity, if everyone adopted that perspective of perception, we would all fall into a state of harming each other to own everything until only one person remained, society would cease, facts would fall to fiction, and every part of us that is beautiful would die. Creativity (every paradigm of art: music, drawing, painting, engineering, poetry), the passing of knowledge, discovery of intellectual proportions, discovery of profundity's pulse and passions...; there is no singular measure to the loss humanity would suffer from selfishness being the singular virtuous ambition of sentience. Compassion is truly sacred.
"We don't know what you are..."
When I heard those words I felt/experienced/thought...
"Some people create, others are simply created..." ~ L.N.S. (me)
(literary art, music, knowledge, etc.) is what this statement meant by the word: "create"
"Reason: That thing everyone is born with but something that not everyone possesses" - Me
It has come to my attention that an ex-girlfriend/creeper/stalker has been sending people whom comment on my art messages filled with negativity. I suffered from Amnesia because of her (though my mind is attempting a repair of sorts, the situation is convolutedly complex, I can create new long term memories but with difficulty, and the process has been stressful and filled with a loss in many facets of my life, but that doesn't mean I will constantly forget those that I meet, and am incapable of creating new memories at all, it is too complicated to put here in this place...if you are interested, ask me sometime...) not to mention the loss perceived by a great series of paradigms within the memory of my life have been stolen from me. I was attacked, and thus shot, in the head, by the malevolent deluded desires of this psychotic ex-girlfriend whom forms self-delusions and lies compulsively, and frequently, in an attempt to make herself seem the victim when in fact she is nowhere near vindicated of her veracity and validity as the villain. She has murdered many, and each time has deluded others into believing it was an accident or that she was innocent. (car accidents are her specialty) Her diagnosis of narcissism/psychopathy(a lack of empathy and true moral insanity)/pretentiousness/personal-self-delusion/violence-absent-rational-cause is valid and true, I held her hand through therapy, and can tell you, she is nothing and nowhere near compassionate or caring. Just selfish/avaricious, and malicious to anyone whom ever has loved or cared about her. (at least in my experience) I have tried to message her, tried to contact her, tried to help her, but she has refused any and all attempts at repairing her damaged mind and soul. I honestly wish she would return to the light, and reject the ravenous retarded regal-less rage machine she has become.
"I believe honesty is an important facet of community. I offer honesty and truth to every singularity of sentience I encounter and expect the same in return. Honesty helps us grow and helps us reach higher heights of personal growth previously unattainable because of our inherent singular place of perspective: "being inside of your vessel." Sometimes there is a benefit of having someone share with you their perspective, as they can perceive from a place that you cannot: "outside of yourself." The understanding of which, and profundity of which, I'm sure, is not lost on you." - Me
"Being a realist myself, I find the prejudiced opinion that realists and pessimists are the same and are cowardly by hiding in the shadows, distant to community, disrespectful and ill-founded. Being a realist is to understand that there are certain truths to the-universe/all-that-there-is that cannot be denied. To never lie to yourself, or allow yourself to be mislead by the burdens of self-delusion, narrow-mindedness, prejudice, or wishful thinking. To remain within the realms of perspective and perception offered the monikers: "logical thought", "rational possibility", and "truth."
I do know that some use certain facts found within such an advanced understanding of intellect and profundity to rationalize removing oneself from society as a whole because it is, logically, safer. If someone were to do so, I agree with you, that person is, indeed, cowardly and simply using half-truths to deny the existence of any other empirical evidence to acquire. Do you know every human being that is currently alive? No? Then you cannot say that EVERY situation of human interaction will be conducted or experienced in a negative manner. There could very well be good people out there, and some people who were once evil or who had committed negative actions CAN indeed come back to the light of compassion and righteousness.
That is to say, can you still maintain a wary perspective of Americans because most of them are selfish, self-possessed, pretentious, avaricious, apathetic feed machines that only want one thing: "more." Yes, yes you can. Does that mean you should treat them all in such a manner or even negatively at all? No, it does not. You should give people a chance to prove their worth and character before you judge them unfairly based on prejudice and stereotypes. There is a reason stereotypes are called stereotypes and not: "facts." It is a separate concept entirely.
If someone were to say: "most people of pure Irish genetic descent have pale white skin." That is a truth. Most of the people who are Irish do indeed have pale white skin. But if you were to say: "all Irish people possess pale white skin." That is not a truth, but merely a personal prejudice of perception on their part. There is, indeed, at least one difference between pessimists and realists, which would explain why they are two separate words: "they are two different paradigms of perception/concepts." -Me
Someone once said: "Art doesn't come from happiness"...
I say: "Most often, it doesn't. That is true, and yet, sometimes, it does. Sometimes, the purest sentiments construct the most elegant and graceful frames of focus, the most pristine purity of sensation within sentiment is profound. Welcome to art, where magic and majesty mystify the mind, send the soul screaming in the spikes of ecstasy found within the significant and special summits of sophistication found by the star-flares of starlight within the sensation of soaring that our soul feels when we sense that rare, almost tangible, sensation of being alive. Welcome to sentience. Welcome to soul. Welcome to Starlight." - Me
"If something is the truth, don't waste time with bothering in the attempt to confuse and corrupt ascertaining the truth by trying to label it as something else, don't distort reality or lie to or delude yourself, it is simply this: "the truth," and nothing else..." -Me
"Kind words can save and change lives. You never know what may, or may not, find it's way to significance in the consciousness of another being's sentience. I hope they have found a way to brighten the light of your life. Sometimes a light requires a catalyst to crystalize the color within it." -Me
"I hope you continue to enjoy a period of prosperity, peace, and a pleasant passionate playful point of perception within the place of your soul's position in the maelstrom of magic and majesty we name: reality."
"Death has ever been by my hand and heart. I have watched loved ones pass from this world. I have faced imminent death more than once. I have buried friends. The loss and subsequent pain aren't the parts of my light: "the will", that hold my hands steady during what may very well be the final challenges I face, it is the understanding that I fight for what is in accord with that soul. The blade that bears my name, the strength of my convictions, the significance of the evolved body and soul I possess, the brilliance within the light of my intellect shining in the spirit perceived through more than just my eyes, all facets of whom I am. I've held onto starlight within, and through, the worst and best of humanity." -Me
"Being an evolved human is a lonely position of reality. I am the only one of my kind. A realization I have come to respect, come to understand as truth/fact, and have spent time attempting to create terms of definition and achieve a state of complete peace within acceptance of this." -Me
"I have fought against the devils and demons within and without, beside fanatics of faith though their lectures still possess insight and significance, giving them endless patience and yet maintaining an open mind to their insanity is somewhat of a difficulty, though, I'm sure, they mean well in their diatribes of dark and light. I live alongside the demented and delusional, and those who've claimed to have achieved a mental state that was disillusioned, though, honestly, every sentient singularity that claimed to clarity was farther away from crystal than they thought. Self-delusion and pretentiousness are something of a viral disease in this manifestation of reality in which I reside. It infects the brightest when they obtain a measure of light that surpasses those around them, when they perceive their light as the brightest around, they stop searching for every source of light. That is their failure. They cease their growth. A star cannot sustain such an existence. I think that is why they burn out and explode. Starbursts to supernova at the pronouncement of pride. A brilliant birth to behold, boundless in brilliant beauty, a majesty and magic with no equal, but maybe that is why only I remain. Every party member, partner, every sacred singularity of sentience, by their luminous light: every star, has fallen. Only I remain. Is it because I believe in the facet of understanding that is realism? Humility within endless growth? Ever entering situations with open ears, eyes, and mind, learning whatever there is to learn? Is it because I consume all the knowledge and continuously strive to grow? Evolution is significant to my existence. It is a concept that helps to define what has happened to me. I evolved. I am no longer human. I understand that now. I was, but now I am something more. Those who have borne witness to the truth of my personal evolution know that I do not speak in jest or in falsehoods about such a profound subject. I have evolved. (this is the truth, if you've gotten this far, ask me about it sometime, what you hear will more than surprise you, I assure you, the truth is something more than your perception has perceived)" -Me
"To Doctor Charles Darwin, I would have loved to enjoy a conversation with you...maybe I'll meet you one day, who knows what door deigns in the darkness of death...(I don't believe in the concepts of hell or heaven, god or satan, these, to me, are fantastic constructs of imagination, the bible is a supremely well made work of fiction with a positive moral, ethical, and inspirational message throughout it's passages, but...it is still a work of fiction. I use logic, sensation, and science as a basis for the facts that I hold.)" - Me
(if we were ever allowed a name of our own choosing)
- Larathain Nai - Lo Starlight
-Scott M. B. J. (the true author of every piece of art on this page, people have tried to steal my art and claim it their own, I can only wonder why)
"Some journeys are made with no destination or end conceived, but discovered through reaching the horizon." - Me